Are You Invested in a Man’s Potential Rather Than Who He is Now?

I’ve dated some amazing men. For example, Matt was a handsome engineer who had once had an illustrious career with the space program.

When I met him, he hadn’t worked there for several years.

He also wasn’t emotionally available.

I attributed his emotional unavailability to him having lost his job, and to being shy. I banked on him coming around.

Plus, I thought surely he could get another high-level engineering job. But, he didn’t, nor did he open up emotionally. He relapsed into chronic on-off drug use, the cause of his job loss.

I left the relationship.

I wasn’t seeing him for who he was. I saw his potential, but it was my vision for him, not his.

We must accept a man we’re dating in the present, as he is now.

Forget about your dream for him and focus on these 3 things instead:

1. Is he emotionally available?

2. Does he treat you well?

3. Is he ready for a commitment?

All 3 can lead to a phenomenal relationship.

If 1 of the 3 is missing, you’re getting caught up in potential.

That leads to unhappiness. Your unhappiness, unfortunately.

You’ll end up feeling resentful while spending way too much time with Mr. Potential.

I believe there is someone for everyone, so waste no time dreaming for someone else’s life.

Focus on your dream, what you want for your life.

Get into reality and go for the relationship that fulfills you now.

He’s out there.